


Ph1LzA joined the game

by lavenderberry



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Dad Philza, Other, dont take this seriously, dream and sap appear for like 10 seconds, dream is here for the shits and giggles, dream whitelist this man already please im crying begging on my knees, please, thats a joke wilbur is alright, wilbur fucking dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-09 07:01:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27159709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lavenderberry/pseuds/lavenderberry
Summary: alternatively; philza joins the dream smp
Relationships: nah - Relationship
Comments: 24
Kudos: 502





	Ph1LzA joined the game

**Author's Note:**

> dream whitelist this man i beg of you mr wastaken please dream please

| _Ph1LzA joined the game_

Seeing the message in chat, Techno stops midway in his task, staring. Why there was a gut feeling residing in him reading the text, he didn't know, but he knew he shouldn't just brush away the feeling. He stands onto his feet, adjusting the mask around his face as a hum slips through. Turning his heel, he grabs ahold of his cape and puts it on, gripping onto his trident. Ascending up his bubble elevator, Techno aims his trident towards the sky the second he reaches the surface of the water. 

Brushing away strands of wet hair out of his face, he shoots up the sky, and immediately aims towards the direction of spawn. Gliding across the wind, he manages to land onto the ground, hearing a started yelp near him as he did so. Techno, still a bit wet from the water, stands as he regains his posture, finding a very familiar blonde and brunette in front of him. Said blonde was most likely the cause of the startled yelp, while the brunette simply waved at him.

"Jesus— fuck's sake, you _seriously_ need to just stop flying around as much as you please.." Tommy breathed out, calming himself down. Techno adjusts the pig mask on his face, merely shrugging his shoulders. "Good to see you too, Tommy, Wilbur."

"Likewise." Wilbur greeted back simply, while Tommy stammered on his words. Wilbur simply continued, "Tubbo was with us earlier, but he went on ahead of us." Techno hums in response, and the three of them began walking toward the direction of spawn, with Wilbur in front, Tommy just behind him, and Techno trailing behind them both.

"About time that green bastard had him whitelisted." Tommy remarked. "Man, what side do you think Phil will be on?"

"Let's just make sure we catch him up on everything that's happened," Wilbur replies, a slight chuckle in his words, "and do I mean _everything_."

"Or," Techno chimes in from behind, "he could just side with whatever side has the goal of taking down the government."

"Yeah, no." 

It was a bit of a silent walk, however the three managed to reach the spawn area in time. They could spot the familiar man in his green attire, chatting happily with a familiar brunette, who they later recognized to be Tubbo. Tommy calls out to them, rushing ahead of Techno and Wilbur and towards Phil. 

"PHILZA MINECRAFT!!" Tommy exclaimed, wrapping the man into both of his arms. "Oh my God! It's about time that you're here!!" Phil chuckles warmly at the boy, hugging back as he ruffles the blonde's hair. "It's good to be here too, Tommy."

As Wilbur was about to give his greetings as well, Techno suddenly grabs him by the wrist. The brunette seems confused, and he couldn't quite read the expression on the latter's face (which, understandably so, considering the pink-haired man had a pig mask on).

"What's up?" Wilbur asks him. Techno lets go of his wrist, shrugging his shoulders. "I don't know, just.." Techno fiddled with a portion of his cape, seeming a bit.. uncertain, for a lack of better term, Wilbur thought to himself. "Uh.. I guess I have a bad feeling about this?"

Wilbur stares at him, even more confused. "It's just Phil, man, nothing to be worried about." He reassures. Techno opens his mouth, about to retort back, yet the brunette was already on his way toward the new arrival. Techno sighs to himself, figuring that he should just brush the feeling aside, and walked towards them, standing just behind Tommy.

"Phil, hey!" Wilbur greets him, smiling brightly. "Good to have you here—"

**_*****SMACK*****_ **

In the blink of an eye, Wilbur is on the ground, face first on the grass as he now sports a bruised cheek. Phil, with a deadpanned look on his face, had his sandal in hand, having used it to smack the brunette on the face. Tubbo lets out a strangled scream, flinching away from the scene. Tommy and Techno widen their eyes, their footing glued to the ground.

"STOP FUCKING TRYING TO KILL YOUR FRIENDS, WILBUR." Phil shouted, an unexplainable rage on his face. A faint 'holy shit' was heard, most likely from Tommy. "STOP BEING A TERRORIST."

Huh, his gut feeling _was_ right. 

Still, it doesn't ease the fact that he felt mostly overwhelmed and taken aback at what had they just witnessed. Tommy, stammering, unable to form a coherent sentence, watches as Tubbo kneels down to Wilbur, jaw dropping as he realizes _holy shit Wilbur is out cold._

Phil then turns his head towards Tommy and Techno, and they flinch at his glare. "DON'T THINK YOU TWO ARE OUT OF THIS."

"W-wait—" Tommy tries to compromise, taking a step back. "P-Phil, c'mon man, l-let's talk, y-.. yeah? Yeah? P-Phil—"

"Tommy—" Techno tries to grab his attention, an unmistakable nervous tone in his words, "Tommy— Tommy let's go— TOMMY RUN—!!" The masked man begins bolting the other way, and the blonde lets out a strangled shriek, running just behind Techno. Tubbo stands from his position, beginning to chase after Phil who was running after the two, in hopes of maybe slowing him down.

"CAN'T YOU FLY?!?!" Tommy yelled out to Techno. "IT'S NOT RAINING, I CAN'T USE MY TRIDENT!" Techno explains, picking up his pace as he grabs Tommy by the arm. 

"GET THE FUCK BACK HERE!!!" Phil yelled out to them, and the two let out panicked shrieks in response. Tubbo, far from slowing Phil down, could only run after them with panicked noises stammering out of them.

"DON'T YOU HAVE A WATER BUCKET ON YOU?!" 

"NO I DON'T, TOMMY, NO I DON'T!!"

"WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU— OH MY GOD HE'S CATCHING UP **RUN FASTER** —"

Screams travel throughout the SMP, and eventually, a man with a pig mask with a blonde teenager clinging onto him for dear life shoot through the sky. Must've used the river, the hooded man thought. This doesn't slow down Phil, however, and he jumps across the river with ease, with Tubbo falling further behind as he swims across. 

"...Is this the reason you had him whitelisted?" Sapnap asked, kneeling down next to Wilbur's body after poking it countless times. It was no mistake that the man was, indeed, unconscious. 

"Well, no," Dream responded, having a camera in hand, recording the entire thing, "but it's part of it." Sapnap snorted, standing as he glances towards Ponk, who was with them. "Do you mind if you take care of him for the meantime?" 

The man shakes his head, waving his hand for further emphasis. "Leave it to Dr. Ponk, you guys have fun." Without a moment to waste he carries Wilbur body and walks out of the spawn area. 

Dream hands Sapnap two stacks of ender pearls, to which the latter graciously accepted. "Man, George is always missing out on things like this." Sapnap sighs, and Dream let out a faint chuckle. "He's living up to his name. C'mon, let's pearl before they get too far. Twitter is going to _love this._ " With a smirk, they throw their respective pearls into the direction to where the three (four, they presumed, with Tubbo and all) had run off to.

"PHIL PLEASE— WHAT DID I EVEN DO?! TECHNO I GUESS I CAN UNDERSTAND BUT WHY AM I A PART OF— **_HOLY SHIT TECHNO RUN FASTER YOU PRICK OH MY GOD_**!!"

"BOTH OF YOU GET BACK HERE SO WE CAN SETTLE THIS!!"

"ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE OH MY GOD PHILZA— PHILZA PLEASE—"

"PHILZA MINECRAFT MAYBE LET'S NOT KNOCK OUT TWO MORE PEOPLE _PHILZA MINECRAFT PLEASE OH MY GOD HAVE MERCY ON THEM PHILZA_ —" Tubbo yelled out, yet despite his efforts Philza didn't pay attention to the brunette.

"PHIL PLEASE WE WEREN'T SERIOUS IT WAS ALL A BIT— IT WAS JUST A ROLEPLAY— _TECHNO WHAT THE FUCK RUN FASTER PLEASE_ —"

"I'M GOING AS FAST AS I CAN TOMMY THE MAN'S UNBELIEVABLY FAST—"

"AREN'T YOU A GOD AT PVP RUN FASTER OH MY GOD—"

"PLAYING SKYWARS ALL THE TIME DOES NOT EQUATE TO A GOOD PLAYER TOMMYINNIT NOW USE YOUR LEGS AND RUN—"

"I AM YOU BASTARD— OH MY GOD _DAD PLEASE HAVE MERCY PLEASE—!!_ "

And thus the day ran with the rest of the SMP players looking confused as they watch a grown man, sandal in hand chase after a pig-masked man with a blonde teenager clinging onto him, with a brunette chasing after said grown man in hopes of slowing him down.

**Author's Note:**

> im drained from online school can you tell i wrote all this in one go


End file.
